Why the Oregon Militia (Y'all Qaeda) absolutley deserve all the dicks they were sent

First a little background: On January 6, 2016 a group of armed idiots took over the the Malhuer Wildlife Refuge in Harney County Oregon. Although it's become convenient to call them the Oregon Militia the groups real name, according to them is The Citizens for Constitutional Freedom and they come from all over the place. There leader is an asshat named Ammon Bundy who is apparently on a mission from God.

Ammon Bundy ~ Driven by God

That's right, he is on a mission from God. In case you didn't know this apparently God wrote the constitution of the United States on Stucky's napkins and gave them to George Washington. We have been messing with God's divine plan for all this beautiful land. How bad? The Bureau of Land Management (BLM) has dared to charge ranchers for using federal lands to graze their cattle. It's irrelevant that the USA charges them far less them they would pay on private land. Or that taxpayers will have to foot the bill to upkeep that land without those grazing fees being collected. These constitutional scholars think they should be able to use the land for free. Bundy's daddy Cliven has refused to pay his grazing fees and even had a standoff with the feds in Nevada last year over this very issue.

If that wasn't bad enough the feds also arrested two men, Dwight and Steven Hammond, for poaching deer and setting fire to federal lands in Oregon (That's not what they claim they did, but their own relatives say they were paoching). These winners were apparently trying to cover up a deer slaughter with a fire and burned a lot of Federal BLM Land. The were sentenced to prison, but for less then the minimum required by law, so the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ordered them back to prison and they also lost their cattle grazing rights for two years.

Apparently this rilled up Ammon Bundy and the Redneck Militia that we are now call Y'all Qaeda or Vanilla Isis. They brought their guns to Oregon for a protest and then bravely stormed and took over an unmanned Wildlife Refuge and they have been there since and will not leave until the federal government gives up control of the wildlife refugee. They were vague about what they wanted at first, but now want the government to give up the land.

Okay so these dumb fuckers gave up jobs and left their loved ones to come and fight the good fight against what they feel is government overreach. Who do they want to control that land? No one is sure, How should there goals be met? They have no idea.

They are a bunch of idiots who want to play army. They are a bunch of seditious traitors who are wanting with all their little hearts to take up arms against their country. Oh, and the Hammond's... the guys these idiots are doing this for, have said straight out to go the fuck away. They don't want their help. At all.

This is Jon Ringlingbrother Ritzheimer. This guy is one of the Militia idiots occupying a federal Government Building in Oregon. He is a combat vet whose only sources of income are his GOVERNMENT disability check and his wife's job. He is a member of the Untied States Paramilitary Patriot movement and was a member of the Oath Keepers until he got kicked out. Wait a minute how the fuck do you get kicked out of the Oath Keepers? Oh, he wanted to arrest a member of the US congress. Apparently that is where the Oath Keepers drew the crazy line.

I could go on and on about Jon but instead I'll leave you with one final fascinating fact. He tried to raise 10 million dollars on a GoFund me page to either finance his life in hiding or challenge John McCain for his Arizona senate seat. 

The main takeaway from this is that Jon is getting disability checks from the government which he is now using to fight the government.

In fact a lot of these guys are on disability or welfare or other government programs. 

Apparently one of them was also in the foster kid business, He was getting over $100,000 a year for fostering four children, On the plus side that money came from Catholic Charities and not from our taxes but something inside of me is deeply cynical about someone whose main source of income was raising children who undoubtedly helped him work his small ranch.

His name is Robert "La Voy" Finicum and he is actually surprised the children were taken away. He is quoted as blaming pressure from the feds who, "must have gotten to the Governor, who told the state to take them away from there." Could it be because he is committing a felony? 

Finicum press conference after destroying supposedly hidden cameras that were in plain site.

Jon Ritzenburger Ritzheimer is right there grabbing 15 more minutes of fame with him.

Seems like a lot of guys with too much time and way to much paranoia got together to play military. Poor dumb overprivileged assholes with too much time on their hands. Willing to follow anyone who will lead them against the government they blame for everything.

So far we have allowed these asshat insurgents to come and go as they please. The government has taken a very low key approach. These assholes have removed cameras and added at least on road to the refuge, destroying public lands. We have done nothing. They have called for reinforcements. We have done nothing. They called for snacks. That's when the Internet started mocking them. That's when the Internet started sending them sex lube, and sex toys. That's when the Internet started sending them dicks.

Jon responds to a good dicking!

They have been called Y'all Qaeda and Vanilla ISIS and those names seem to fit. As I said Ammon Bundy believes this is his divine purpose. He is being driven by God, just as ever religious zealot is. And like any good religious zealot he has found many willing to follow him. So the names fit. They are the American Taliban.

They are also poor fools who think this rich man is acting in their best interests. Ammon Bundy is the son of a millionaire. These are not people fighting for the rest of us, they are fighting for the 1% as fools throughout history have always done. Cliven Bundy is not some small rancher getting crushed by the Government. No! he is a super rich asshole who just doesn't want to pay his fair share. Make no mistake if it wasn't for the BLM these lands would probably already be used up. The Bundy's and this militia are not just trying to take this land from the government, they are trying to take it from all of us.

And that's why they all deserve a big bag of dicks!